DBP Chapter Eight

Don't Bet On the Prince by Dr. Gilda Carle
Chapter Eight
Incorporate the Language of Love
To communicate lovingly, a woman must know who she is and express it: Power. She must know what she wants and express it: Purpose. She knows what to do and express it: Play. If she is missing those then love shrinks.
Gilda-Gram: 1) Friends first, lovers later. 2) Fall in like before you fall in love. 3) For stress-reduced communication with your man, use male talk first, female talk later. Or deals first, details later. 4) The four words men hate most are “Let’s discuss the relationship.” 5) Male intimacy is to commune. Female intimacy is to converse. 6) Without rules there are no boundaries. Without boundaries there is no self. Without self there is no love. 7) To clear your communication static, change the channel. 8) Play together to stay together. 9) If you’re too busy to play, you’re too busy. 10) Don’t delay Play.
In relationships we are all works in progress, and the job never ceases. Love requires both giving and receiving. We must remember our purpose in being together. To give and receive passion, we must also offer compassion.
Play in the sense of simply enjoying life. Honor each other and play together. Your ability to laugh and play strengthens your bond of friendship with your partner.

*this part talked about many couples and how to keep a good relationship going by talking in the language of love. It didn’t really inspire me to write about since it was mostly stories and it was too hard to put into words. Just be honest, be yourself, assess the relationship, take time to understand, and express yourself. The best line in this chapter was “Trust is the deepest ingredient of lasting love.” That saying I love you has been used to freely and I do believe trust is key in a lasting relationship without trust there can be no relationship. Looking back at my past relationships in order for me to be intimate with someone I had to have trust, it was my self aphrodisiac, but that trust was hardly returned and I was betrayed. So now I am not quick to trust and therefore I cannot get intimate. Again looking back at my previous relationships my partners didn’t really enjoy what I enjoyed. It’s funny because what I thought they did make me happy but they didn’t, I wasn’t really happy, it was the chemicals in my brain thinking I was but my heart wasn’t. From now on I know that I will not tolerate a lot of the stuff I put up with and I deserve someone who will give me what I want since I know what I need.*