Loving Diversity

Differences can make a couple dynamic, but opposites may not always last. What matters is how they actively deal with their emotional response to the differences.

You have different religion. It’s good that you are both faithful. Just take the time to understand and respect each other’s religion. Make plans to avoid future holy wars.

You have different political views. Take the attitude of curiosity about what makes the other one tick, instead of trying to change their mind. Influence each other and develop similar political attitudes. Debate can be good for your health.

You have different views on how to spend money. Financial issues are among the leading causes of divorce. When there is no meeting of the minds about money, there is no trust. As the saver you will feel burdened and betrayed since they become defiant or dishonest. Make sure you stand on the same ground, compare credit reports or bank statements and see how they are handling things in the stormy economy.

You don’t agree on kids, rather it’s none to many. For most parenthood is critical, and can be an aspect of a person identity. They may feel incomplete without it and if you don’t agree resentment may flare. Understand each others feelings on the matter and why they feel that way and try to come up with options to make both of you happy.

Your cleaning habits do not match. Make a list of chores you love to do and hate to do. Keep in mind that a man creates 7 additional hours of housecleaning for his wife. Work something out so that the chores are covered, that both make sacrifices and the house stays clean.
You spend your leisure time differently. Opposites can attract but you do want to have some things in common. Couples who play together, stay together. Sharing interest forges a bond and is good for the long haul. If you spend you leisure time differently make sure you respect them by respecting what they do and work a way to coexist together. She likes to knit and he likes to watch the game, then she can keep him company while he watches the game and she can knit. They have discovered ways to be themselves and be together.
Challenge them to see things from a different perspective. Challenge them to live up to a certain standard, show the backbone, they should become a better person as a result.

That is what love is suppose to be like.