We may learn from painful breakups but some can’t resist the temptations of an ex. They are always on the way into your heart or on the way out. To some being alone can be more painful then being in a bad relationship, it’s heartbreaking, and trying to do it alone is overwhelming and that’s why they get stuck in a revolving door.
But it’s time to break free of that no good relationship. You ex isn’t good for you. After all your ex is an ex for a reason.
Change your routine and point of view and explore different activities, go to new places, and spend time with friends.
Figure out what is keeping your life in stalemate. Figure out why you are relying on a broken relationship and keep on returning to it. Figure out why this is pattern is not a good thing.
Reflect on it makes you feel. Write down the emotions that come to your mind when you think about breaking up with your ex or the emotions you feel when they break up with you. Most likely the list is not built upon love alone.
Keep a list of why the relationship can’t work out and why you broke up.
If you worried about going back to your ex if you happen to run into them then flee, indulge in some self-preservation. Avoiding contact might be a healthy course of action, especially if it ended badly.
If you would like to give them another chance you need to remove the love goggles first. Most of the time you can see that they were a toxic partner and that they won’t ever change. It may take months to see your ex clearly; sometimes being slighted one final time can expedite the process. If not just wait for the infatuation and hurt to wear off. They will just become another person.
If you believe them to have been a close friend and that you do not want to lose that friendship part of the relationship try to be friends without the hooking-up part. If you can’t handle being next to them without being sexually then I would forget the friendship since it shows that you can’t be close without being physical and that you weren’t friends.
Running into your ex can be an opportunity to heal things, to let go of old baggage. Giving a hug and saying you have no hard feelings against them can bring peace to your mind.
Allow yourself the freedom to be sad, angry, lonely, and so on. Once they have moved through you they will lose their potency and you will be ready to say good bye for good.
Take these tings on a case by case basis. You can never second guess the recovery speed of your heart.
*Out of all my break-ups I was able to set things right with 3/5 of them, the other 2/5 I have learn to let them go without forgiveness. Due to 2/5 of it I would certainly flee from since they brought the worst out in me. I had a revolving relationship with 1/5 and almost had a revolving one with another, but I decided to break out of that pattern and realized they are an ex for a reason and it can’t work out. And now I’m happier being by myself and know that I can move onto a better relationship.*
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